![]() Maybe it was a dress rehearsal, a scam, designed to pull our chains. Maybe that wasn't really the last episode. He said he wanted to peter out, exhausted, out of gas. In his self-satirizing way, he didn't agree with the principle of quitting on top. In the final minutes of hype on WNBC / 4, during a "Seinfeld Scrapbook" segment on "Access Hollywood" Thursday, Jerry seemed to say it all. People like George Kohlman of Port Washington claimed to have written a final episode that might even make TV history "the way Bonanza' did with the flapjack-eating contest." To everybody like Chris Wolf, a funny writer "trapped in a house on Long Island," and everybody else who wrote and sent me their finale scenarios, the good news is, yours were better - if that's any consolation. The other good thing is that it has put an end to finale scenariowriting, a leading cottage industry. Anything is possible with NBC, suffering from a serious case of finalitis as seen in this theme week of hour-long finales. Worse, Jerry could have started dating "Caroline in The City." As far as I know. In the big secret ending, Jerry - or even Kramer, George or maybe Elaine in this post-"Ellen" age - could have wound up marrying Brooke Shields' "Suddenly Susan" character in a fabulous crossover finale. On the positive side, I must say, it could have been a lot worse. The pressure was enormous on Larry and Jerry and they choked. It was like expecting Patrick Ewing to come back with his wrist perfect and win the playoffs. Larry David was a little rusty in his return. The quite unpleasant sour movie needed Jerry. You could see how bitter this guy really is. He went off to make a movie ("Sour Grapes") that turned out to be elongated "Seinfeld" in 90 minutes. The false hope was that the return of Larry David, the man who created these Kabuki characters - with Jerry's help, of course - would change things, bring the show back to where it was when David quit while he was ahead in 1996. Sometimes they do something funny, sometimes not. People expect the Fab Four to just show up onstage, playing their set parts. What really went wrong?įirst of all, "Seinfeld" the last two years has become bigger than comedy. But, for now, I'd just like to say: It goes to prove money isn't everything in the writing of comedy. Still, future scholars will be poring over this last episode like the Dead Sea Scrolls. ![]() It was so much more wholesome than a preoccupation with a president's sex life (Did he or wouldn't she?), the oral history of our times. It was a national folk happening, a chance for the whole nation to commune, to share a common experience, like the JFK funeral or the end of "M*A*S*H." Remembering the end of "Seinfeld" seemed so much better than some other memories people have had: famines, the start of the Khmer Rouge killing fields. ![]() The end of "Seinfeld" Thursday night was more than just a TV program. But long after the hype, hype hooray ends, we will be analyzing this turning point in western civilization. The last episode undoubtedly broke all the records for hype, for the number of commercials per quarter hour and the size of the audience. Seeing the four of them in the same room like this also reminded me of Sartre's "No Exit," which postulates that the worst kind of hell is being sentenced to an eternity with people who keep talking about existentialism, or nothing.īut there I go, trying to put the best spin on what was a major comedic disaster. Bob Newhart would wake up next to Suzanne Pleshette saying, "I had this crazy dream about these four disgusting people being locked up in jail together. I kept thinking the show would end with a final surreal statement. The doctor describing George's reaction to Susan's death as "restrained jubilation." That was real "Seinfeld." Babu, the Pakistani restaurateur, recounting how Jerry got him deported. ![]() Elaine falling into Sidra's chest in the sauna to see if it was real. George's Trivial Pursuit argument with the bubble boy. ![]() The flashbacks, with the prosecutor recalling past antisocial behavior by the New York 4, were hilarious. ![]()
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